hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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