They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
