Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
