i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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