A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
