Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
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