question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
