How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
