508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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