just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
