She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
she told me i tasted like america
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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