awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
