yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
