They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
