And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Randomize
