Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
bring money and cleavage
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
