I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize