I think scott just propositioned me for sex
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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