oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Randomize
