God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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