what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I'm too high and old for this...
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
