If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
