We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
What a dumb baby whore.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I would ride that face into the sunset
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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