Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
