if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
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