dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
