Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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