ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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