just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
