He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
