there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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