eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize