My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
