I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize