Your dad touched me again.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize