The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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