Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
