Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
She said her name was "party"
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
The feeling are messing with the penis
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
