whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I think I died a long time ago.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
