Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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