This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
