My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
