Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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