I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
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