I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize