It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
