So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
There's even glitter on my cock...
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