I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
