And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Randomize
