I must be too annoying 4 u.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize